Oh Lordy, Lordy, Lordy! What a few weeks it has been in the world of F1.
Grid girls, grid kids, the racing world revolving around the one and only Fernando Alonso. Bit of a rollercoaster and, honestly, I’m a bit dizzy and want to get off this ride now.
I’ve honestly felt like I’ve been back in school. The bickering, the bitchiness, the constant rule changes, the favouritism. Deja vu. I’m sure I left 6 years ago…
Let me break it down for you into some categories that most, if not all, schools/classes had *The people who fit these categories at my school still fit them*:
The Leery Creep
The Opinionated Arsehole
The Prefect*normally knocked off their moral high horse after their first drink*
The Teacher’s Pet
So, we’ll start at the very beginning. A very good place to start *chronologically at least*….
The Leery Creep
We had the ‘shocking’ announcement that they would be removing grid girls from F1, following on from the likes of darts *obviously they’re not grid girls but you know* and Formula E *we’ll talk later about that*.
PERSONALLY, I do not give a flying fuck either way but, lo and behold, the announcement has unearthed some closet women’s rights activists!
I’ve seen so many ridiculous comments floating round on Twitter/Instagram/Facebook about this.
‘F1 is dead’
‘It’s a tradition!’
‘It’s ruining the show’
GET OVER IT, YOU BUNCH OF LUNATICS!
My mind boggles at how many times I saw the same comments floating around about how it was ruining things or how they were losing fans. I thought F1 was about the cars, the racing, the talent. Not about the women you see for 30 seconds *may be longer, I don’t pay attention* with a board in a skimpy outfit *not always skimpy but you catch my drift*. If that’s all you take from a race weekend, a bit of soft porn *some of the outfits can be a bit much* then I’m concerned about you. London Fashion Week may be more of your jam than a race track full to the brim with testosterone and blokes if I’m honest.
I’m all for women doing their thing and doing what they enjoy. My only issue is that, because I’m a female, the first and ONLY thing men *not tarring you all with the same brush, just the ones that message me* think you want to be when you say you want to work in motorsports is that you want to be a grid girl.
Let’s get a few things straight here;
1) People would actually pay to not see me in lycra.
2) I have the coordination of a drunk toddler and am a grand total of 5’2 so the sign would most definitely end up in/on the car.
And 3) I like to write and I like to talk so standing like a teapot would not be my thing *I also can’t control my face/eyebrow and have a mega resting bitch face*
THERE! That’s it! That is my only issue with grid girls.
I don’t feel intimidated by them *others may and I understand where they’re coming from on that* I just think it’s a dated tradition these days when we’re trying to encourage women to join the world of racing and you mainly see them used as decorations.
The Opinionated Arsehole
I AM ALL FOR GRID KIDS. ALL FOR IT.
But then came the ‘child labour’ comments. The people who don’t like change, digging for a reason to be negative. The ‘traditionalist’ and health and safety nuts that argue how the ‘show’ won’t be the same without the ‘pretty girls and fast cars’ or how dangerous it is for kids to be around the cars.
OKAY THEN! ENJOY PUTTING YOUR CHILD IN A PLASTIC BUBBLE TO PROTECT THEM FROM LIFE WHILST YOU TELEPORT BACK TO THE 50’S SO WOMEN ARE SEEN AND NOT HEARD!
Honestly, y’all sound R.I.D.ICULOUS.
Kids meeting their idols, having the opportunity to experience that world is an amazing reward for their hard work and efforts. It’s a reward that very few can afford and getting to actually stand that close to the cars, teams and drivers as they do all their last-minute preparation is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Let’s face it, many of these kids will have grown up being told that, like a lot of us, our ‘outlandish’ dreams are just that ‘dreams’ and we should focus on something more obtainable, to ‘settle’. So why not!? Why not reward their work to get where they are? To be the best in their series? What is so wrong with encouraging their hard work instead of picking fault?
Formula E have done the grid kid thing before. They are slightly ahead of the times with that and with the fan participation bit so we all applauded and put them on the pedestal to show the non believers that FE is good and proper….
But oh how the mighty have fallen. No sooner had they made a dig at Formula 1 and ‘welcomed’ them to the future, it was announced that they would be using grid girls in their next race.
Can I offer you some concealer to cover up that red face you’ve got there, FE?
The Teacher’s Pet
Fernando Alonso has been confirmed as the only racing driver to exist in the entire world!
Dramatic, I know but that is exactly how it feels!
So, the key points of this are as follows:
WEC had rearranged the date of the 6 Hours of Fuji to prevent a clash with IMSA Petit Le Mans where some of the WEC drivers are already racing.
*Fernando Alonso enters stage right with Toyota*
WEC notice that 6 Hours of Fuji clashes with the US GP.
WEC CHANGE THE DATE OF FUJI TO SUIT ONE PERSON AND FUCK THE REST OF THEM. YOU ALL HAVE TO SUFFER!
Where is the justice? I like Fernando and I don’t believe for one minute that he’s turned around, dummy flying from pram, and demanded they change it for him *I’m rooting for you here, Fernando, you better not have been a diva*.
Quite obviously, this has been big news and I imagine has brought the series to the attention of many other people but JESUS GUYS! There are better ways to make headlines than to piss off an entire grid of people and cause a good few bitchy comments *rightly so in my opinion*.
Last but not least(slight side note really)…the 2018 liveries.
So far we have a slightly brighter white HAAS and a Williams with more black. Both sporting the halo obviously *another thing I’ve no strong feelings about* but pretty much the same old livery with slightly more/newer paint.
I’m hoping to be wowed newt week by some amazing design or drastic colour change… or even an OTT presentation but I’m not holding my breath.
*Prays for 2017 Force India style livery change/reveal* Props to whoever decided that because I WAS SPEECHLESS!
So yes, once again, Twitter has been full of petty arguments, ‘loyal’ fans and just general childish behaviour that make me question why I’m part of this fanbase.
Welcome back to school, guys. Some people’s minds never leave apparently…